Well, sir, ol' Varley Scupple up an bagged him a pet. Me, a freaking lizard twice't as ugly as anything yall eva seen. Monkeyboy sailor thought he'd grow hissef a monster take ova da hole whorl! Who'd a thunk ol' Varley wooda done such? Anywho, he call me Aphrodite, as she were birthed right outta da ocean jes like me, or so it seem to ol' Varley out in de middle a da mighty South Pacific island hopping between wild native cultures. He commence ta use me for scientific purposes, like I said he wanted to be King of Earth or something, mixing me up in hypnotism, shaman drugs, music an etheric energy. At first I wuzn't having it! But, then I began to dig that Varls wuz hip to something. See, he been gathering up all dis knowledge from the various South Pacific natives, an it wuzn't like they wuz some kind of slouches at it, an then he were throwing he own twist. I mean, here it wuz 1889, a dee mind you, something wuz bound to happen along the lines he wuz stearing, if not with me some other lizard. One day he wuz hypnotizing me up something fierce, putting a double mumbo on the jumbo as it were, an as a wild wheel of etheric energy ectoplasmically swirled before my delighted gaze I begun to receive telepathic communioncation from cats way beyond the far gone. They even vibed over into my being the ability to telepathically speak to Varls, to relay the good news an such. At first Varls wuzn't having it. But, I eventually lead him to the truth. Varls began regular daily chats with the Etidorhpaians, that's what they call theyselfs, an tHey say tHey jus wanNa be frenZ.